Hosting what matters….What does that mean? What does that look like? It starts by asking yourself one, simple question “Will this matter?” This one question will help ensure that each hosting experience you have will be impactful for you and for your guests. This simple question will help you to know what events to host, decide what food to serve, what décor to have, what venue to book, how to direct conversations, and much more.
There are many events that matter in our lives. Birthday parties, Retirement parties, Thanksgiving feasts, Christmas parties, Baptisms, Office meetings, Brunches, Coffee dates- the list goes on and on. Have you ever hosted one of these events and afterwards just felt drained and empty? Or ever attended an event that left you feeling unwelcome or thought was kind of pointless. If not hosted to matter these events, frankly are just a waste of your and your guests precious time. What does it look like to make sure these hosting opportunities matter?
Let me give you a casual example. My neighbor knows that I love her homemade chocolate chip cookies. There is something about biting into that gooey, chocolate chip cookie that warms my soul and makes everything right in this world. (I know I may have an unhealthy relationship with chocolate chip cookies, but c’est la vie!). One day my neighbor baked some of her chocolate chip miracles and popped by my house to surprise me with a few. I welcomed her in and we lounged on the sofa of my front office sipping coffee, discussing our personal challenges and triumphs as I affectionately devoured the chocolate chip cookies. After our 45 minute visit I felt encouraged and recharged, I bet my neighbor felt the same. This meeting mattered.
What made it matter? I quickly made several choices to make this hosting experience matter. First, when I opened the door I welcomed my neighbor in my home and warmly accepted her gift of cookies. Alternately, I could have opened that door, and just dropped the plate of cookies on the table by the front door, politely said “thank you” only to go on to complete my meaningless tasks like washing the dishes and picking up the endless tornado of items littered all over my house by my three young children. That strategy would have communicated to my neighbor that I did not value our relationship, her thoughtfulness, and the yummy cookies she took the time to make that I thoroughly enjoy. (The latter I would NEVER want to communicate because I want more of those yummy cookies! :)) Next I made the decision to invite her in to visit for a bit, which relayed to her that I found her important and worthy of my time. My messy house and my kids occasionally running around squealing did not impact my ability to be a good host. My ultimate goal in hosting is to forge relationships that are profitable. I want the people who leave my house to feel better than they did when they walked into it. Do my neighbor and other guests think to themselves, “I can’t wait to go back there to hang out- that environment felt accepting and encouraging.” After enjoying the cookies and conversation with my neighbor I communicated to her that she turned my “normal” day into to an extraordinary one.
Now don’t misunderstand me, there are times we can’t always drop everything to host impromptu guests. But even in that scenario we can make the interaction matter. We do so by showing appreciation and prioritizing the value of our relationships with others. Every person has a desire to feel significant and a have a sense of belonging. I wish I could say that I have always received people as described in the above example, but that would be a flat-out lie. There are many occasions in which I let my temporary to do list rule my actions and choices when it came to hosting. Maybe it’s just my life experience in being a guest at events that were very impactful and those that were just lame that has made it more important than ever to me to recognize the power of hosting in a way that matters.
At hostingwhatmatters.com, we will go on adventures together to learn how to host things that matter. Spoiler Alert! The key to hosting things that matter is THE PEOPLE! People are the key to making these experiences matter. When you choose to host things that matter, careers will be born, marriages started and strengthened, children shepherded, character developed, and friendships cultivated. If you choose to host through this paradigm your life will be more successful, more meaningful, and full of laughter and fun. I know what your thinking-“Melissa, that is a big claim!” Yep, I know, but that is how powerful I believe hosting things that matter is and how passionate I am about this topic.
Our goal at hostingwhatmatters.com is to help you discover ways to host things that matter with ease. We will share many resources to enhance your gatherings. But it will not be the table linens, centerpieces, food, drinks or entertainment in the end that will matter. These are just tools that enhance the experience. It will be the people involved that matter. With that, I invite you, my reader, to share with all of us the hosting experiences that you have had that matter to you! Because YOU matter!
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